Pond Boss Forums GENERAL QUESTIONS Pond Boss Happy Birthday, JHAP!

Hello fellow Pond Meisters. It is I the great and powerful JHAP. (Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain!)

So despite the rumors to the contrary I'm not dead yet, although some days during tax season I do resemble the walking dead.

So where are you JHAP, and what have you been up to you ask politely....

Well since you asked... A few years ago Ricki and I sold our beach property and moved up to Northern California with the intention to build on our beloved pond property. El Dorado County (where our property was located) required so many permits: grading permit, well permit, septic permit, building permit, solar permit, and I think even a permit permit. Between all of the permit costs and a requirement to asphalt pave an 1,100 foot road to our house site I determined it would have been too expensive to build there. Once we built our house we would have by far more cost in the property than it is worth.

Being of sound mind (well at least compared to some of you folks and you know who you are) I decided to throw in the towel on that property. So we did what any red blooded American would do. We put the pond property up for sale and moved to Texas. It took almost two years to sell the pond property but yesterday, on leap year day, escrow closed on "Hidden Lake Ranch." Yep I sold the ranch. I said a tearful good bye to all of the Gams (remember Silence of the Gams?), I sold the LMB, the BG, the RES and yes I even sold my beloved GSF. My ill tempered GSF flipped me the middle fin while I walked away.

Wait did you say "moved to Texas"? Yes, and thank you for paying attention, I know some of you have shorter attention spans than a gold fish (I'm thinking of Sunil here but I'm not naming any names). We did in fact move to Texas. Ricki and I ended up purchasing a house in Texas Hill Country. We bought a house on 10 acres that overlooks Canyon Lake. So we have a beautiful home that overlooks a good sized lake that I don't have to maintain. It's not quite the same as owning your own pond but I gotta tell ya life is pretty darn good.

Texas has a reciprocal agreement with California regarding my CPA license that only required a few forms, a back ground check, and a very thorough cavity search and then I can became dual licensed in both California and Texas. So I am now practicing in two states and I will continue to practice until I get good at it.

Ultimately, the Green Sunfish Association was declared a terrorist organization and after the confiscation of all of our weapons, our black mail book, my GSF costume, my entire collection of Brazilian Cut Neoprene Codpieces (oh come on, you knew I was going to mention BCNP sooner or later) and even a beloved box Oreo cookies (and we're talking double stuffed, not that skimpy single layer cookie) the GSA is no longer.

I sincerely miss all of the fun interactions with all of you OGs (OG means Original Gangster for those of you that don't have street cred, and Olive Garden for those of you that love reasonable Italian food with never ending breadsticks) we had so many fun times together and I miss you all.

I am loving Texas (I have become a Born Again Texan as they say). So if you see a handsome, suave, mature looking person in Texas don't be afraid to say howdy. It ain't me but saying howdy is just plain polite.

Now if you see an overweight, balding guy, rowing through the gears of a 73 Brewster Green Trans Am, and laughing the entire time, then you found me. JNLHAP (Jeff No Longer Has a Pond) has managed to avoid in lengthy prison sentences and is enjoying life in Texas.

Thank you all for thinking of me, I appreciate you all.

OMG - It is great to hear your news!!!. I haven't laughed so hard since you left. YOU STILL EVEN HAVE YOUR GREAT HUMOR DESPITE LIVING IN TEXAS. Thank God you and Ricki are still alive. There are probably a few GSF waiting for you in Canyon Lake. You and Ricki go catch one someday and show us a picture. Don't be such a stranger here we need more of your great sense of humor!!!!!!!