Pond Boss Forums GENERAL QUESTIONS Pond Boss The Best Christmas Fruit Cake Recipe

The Best Christmas Fruit Cake Recipe You Ever Tried! Guaranteed to be fun to make!

Christmas Whiskey Cake

1 cup butter

2 cups sugar

6 large eggs

2 teaspoons baking powder

3 cups flour, sifted

1/2 t. salt

1 cup bourbon

1 pound pecans, chopped


3 cups white raisins (or use candied fruit)

1 t. nutmeg

AND

~ a very large bottle of bourbon whiskey ~



First, sample the whiskey to check for quality.

Assemble all of the ingredients. Check the whiskey again.

To be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.

Repeat this step.

Turn on the electric mixer and beat one cup of butter in a large

fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar and cream until beat.

Make sure the whiskey is still okay... try another cup.

Turn off the mixer. Beat six leggs and add to the bowl,

then chunk in the cup of dried flut. Mix on the tuner.

Throw in two quarts of flour. Gradually pour in the cow.

Add 2 dried anything.

If the fried druit gets struck in the beaters, pry it loose with

a drewscriver. Sample the whiskey and check it again for tonsistency.

Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something. Whateva???


Check the whiskey again.

Now sift the nutmeg and strain your nuts. Add one table.

And the spoon. Of whiskee. Or something. Whatever you find left.

Grease the oven.

Turn the crake pan to 350 degrees. Don't forget to beat off the turner.

Pour the oven into the batter. Throw the bowl out the window.

Lick the batter off the floor.

Bake 300 minutes at 50 degrees.

Finish the blobble of whishy and flow to bed.

Strange, I use the exact same recipe except I substitute Captain Morgan's Spiced Rum for the Whiskey.

I get the humor but just out of curiosity is there anyone out there that actually likes those fruit cakes? I honestly can't say I know anyone that doesn't try and hold in a groan when they get one.

Of course it doesn't help they are probably a minimum of three years old when you get them as people just keep passing them back and forth.

"Finish the blobble of whishey and flow to bed".

I hear they make good pond structure. Like cement blocks, only longer lasting.

I could probably use one to start getting the ammonia up to get my nitrification cycle going. On the other hand the bacteria might not like it either.

It's too late anyway. I tinkled in the tank today.

I do! I love them.

But, that's just me. When I came in from snow plowing earlier, I had headcheese and pickled herring as my snack.

One good thing about having tastes like I do, is that nobody steals my favorite snacks. The downside is that when I take them to work, they sometimes get thrown out with the toxic waste.

Heck, I like fruitcake. My Mother used to make a great one. However, I have tried a couple that weren't real tasty.

I don't know why people make fun of fruit cake, I like them as long as they're less than 3 years old.

You're getting to be a real card AP. It must be you've gone snow blind and slap happy.

It's called Dementia.

Man, this thread reminds me of my heroine, the Fruitcake Lady (RIP).

All seriousness aside, if you add only ingredients you like to eat straight up to the fruitcake, it will be palatable. You have to watch things like dates and candied citrus rind that you may not like to eat straight up.

Merry Christmas to all!