Pond Boss
Here’s a quote from Nebraska football coach Bo Pelini today:

When asked about Nebraska’s tenuous quarterback situation, Pelini responded, “Yes, It’s true that Condello has been named starting quarterback. We’ve been pleased with the progress of Green, and of course Zac has starting experience from last year. That being said, the new NCAA rules, which require us to start at least one middle-aged dentist, have forced us to be creative in our two-deeps. In the past we would have taken a slow, weak player like Condello and hide him at the Mike linebacker position, but with the use of more one linebacker sets in our Peso defense, we were forced to put Condello in the least important position on the team. Placing Condello at quarterback allows us to continue to put emphasis on the running game, while not handicapping the defense to any great extent”.

When asked to elaborate on Bruce Condello’s skill set, Pelini responded, “Condello’s lack of speed is more than offset by his lack of any appreciable strength. Bruce improved quite a bit at spring conditioning, increasing his bench from 125 lbs, up to 175, which, by percentage was the greatest increase on the squad. Condello also lowered his 40 yd dash time from 5.9 to 5.7 which offered us great encouragement, but not enough to risk placing him on defense”.

Offensive coordinator Shawn Watson, when asked about the “Condello at quarterback” controversy responded by saying, “I’m only vaguely aware of the fact we have a dentist on the squad. I knew that the NCAA was mandating the use of older health professionals on college football teams, but this guy is apparently too busy at his office to show up for fall practice. I’m going to have to go with Coach Pelini’s instinct on this one. We’re actually predicting that with Condello at quarterback we’ll be at least as potent on offense as we were in 2009”.

I can see the playbook...
What the hell is 31 root canal, on 3
I’m only vaguely aware of the fact we have a dentist on the squad....

laugh
I have only one question for you Bruce.





What the hell have you been smoking?

Oh nevermind, I forgot that you have a lifetime supply of giggle gas.
"Way too busy at his office"???????


I'm thinking..........NOT!!!!!!!




Thanks for the new chest pains from laughing Brewster!
Haha! Congrats Bruce! Be a good "game manager" and you might go down as one of the best mediocre quarterbacks of the new era!
Little wonder that Bo has been so pissy at his news conferences lately.
Congrats, Bruce. Just think - you'll have three years of eligility left for Big Ten Linebackers to take shots at you!

"Win one for the Gasser!"
The best dentist/quarterback there never was.
We will be sure to "welcome" you to the Big Ten - Go Bucks!
I'm sure you will be the CROWN jewel of the offense while FILLING in for more experienced QBs. When PROBING the defense be sure to EXTRACT yourself from situations where you may be NUMBED from injury. Try not to get too GASSED running from LBs. I'd give my EYE TEETH to see you play like and an inDENTUREd slave.
LOL!

By the way, if you Google "Condello quarterback", this thread is already #1. laugh
Literally. laugh
Heybud that's real talent !!

Here is Bruce's first PB football replay.

http://www.pondboss.com/ubb/ultimatebb.php?ubb=get_topic;f=20;t=003792;p=1


Originally Posted By: jeffhasapond
I have only one question for you Bruce.





What the hell have you been smoking?

Oh nevermind, I forgot that you have a lifetime supply of giggle gas.


1. We both have an abundance of Pond Weed growing at our places

2. Bruce doesn't use giggle gas at his practice - I've requested on numerous occasions to perform QC tests so he knows he's allowing patients the correct doses - usually after a few beers together. No dice - doesn't stock it...supposedly
Heybud's response is a good candidate for the PB Hall of Gaffes. laugh
Bruce you may surpass even brett favre as the oldest qb
I'm sure when the season is over Bruce will get a PLAQUE for his performance. I just can't help myself.
That bridges over well to you last tongue in cheek post. It gave me a toothy grin.
Originally Posted By: james holt
Bruce you may surpass even brett favre as the oldest qb


I was already a quarterback in high school when Mr. Favre was waiting until the last second to decide if he was going to potty train.
George Blanda was older.
George Blanda was older. Oldest person to play in an NFL game: 48 years, & 109 days
He may be the oldest in an NFL uniform, but I'm suiting up in college! smile
But did Blanda have all his teeth? grin
I think it was just every other one.
Bruce is a hustle guy, smart player, brings his lunch pail....
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