Pond Boss Forums INTRO Questions & Observations Re-prioritization

I need help...big help. And there is only one collection of experts that can pull me through; The Pond Boss Clinic.
I'm knee deep in debt after diggin' the pond last year, and I fear my bookeeper, Donna-ski, is going to clamp down on funding. She says it's for my own good; she just don't know. I gotta buy fish and I have a bunch of cool pond projects that I have to do or I'm just gonna hold my breath and die.
I need some clever ideas for fund re-allocation. Maybe some good psychological manipulations; the stuff you guys are soooo good at. I'm on the 3 yard line and I'm feelin' like bad Rex . What am I gonna do?

Buy a few, put up 2 blocking nets, let 'em spawn. No problem. fatheads, fatheads, fatheads. Bluegill, bluegill, bluegill. Baager, baager,baager

What the heck is a Baager???
Am I gonna need cream cheese?

Well, I'm hip deep in debt after digging my pond, so I'm not one to be giving advice.

Hey, maybe you can tell your accountant the fish will pay for themselves, just like all those tools and wheeled vehicles stacked up in the shed. That always worked for me!

Do the fish this year; finish projects later on, come more $. You can get a lot of fish instead of one load of lumber. Forage stocking in the Spring won't hurt too much, add the predators in 6-12 months (what did the SMB guys recommend?). Also sprach Theothrustra.

Dear Dr Gallustenheimer,
I am unfamiliar with this maneuver, but the name intrigues me. Please explain further. Also, include my name on your monthly newsletter distribution.

Theo speaks the truth?
Baager...soft 'g'. we no needno steenkin baagers

My wife lets me spend money when I use the following lies:

1. Gotta spend money to make money

2. It's a tax write off.

3. My handbook says that for every dollar I spend on my pond, they land value goes up 1.50, so we're building equity.

She probably needs bluegill and fatheads for a St. Patricks Day present.

Actually, if you stock just 1/2 enough forage and wait a little longer, they will spawn and give you the numbers you need. And, you will be just as proud of seeing newly spawned FH and BG as you will by looking at predators.

You have marched down the field and are now on the 3 yard line. This is no time to do a Tony Romo. And don't sneak around behind her back and/or lie about it. You have my gold plated guarantee that you will get caught.

Brettski - It won't help the financing so much as getting your mind right so you can figure out improved pond funding opportunities. Brettski Mind Right

A new ring tone for Donna-ski� cell phone could also be extremely effective. Donna-ski Ring Tone

Dwight, that actually makes me long for Hamsterdance.

Theo Gallus - Hampton says, "be yourself"!



We could all learn a lesson from Hampton! :rolleyes:

Well, you could always Deleted.


[ February 17, 2007, 10:05 PM: Message edited by: Brettski ]

Quote:

Also sprach Theothrustra

Careful, Theo, or the following scenario could unfold:


"Hal, open the pond bay door"

"I'm sorry, Theo, I can't do that"

We'd hate to lose you from the forum. However, perhaps Bruce could expand on the concept. With all the rapid genetic and behavioral evolution occuring in his bluegill ponds, perhaps the presence of a black obelisk would be desirable. And bluegills are said to be very sensative to magnetic fields.

Bruce, I would suggest you limit the natural resources present in your ponds or your 'gills may be setting forth in vehicles make of fenceposts, aerator tubing, and tractor tires.

Brettski I am profoundly glad to see that you and Donna-ski are on the same mind-right/ring tone page. Now you guys tell me how and what you did to Lance's post.

Brettski I am profoundly glad to see that you and Donna-ski are on the same mind-right/ring tone page. Now you guys tell me how and what you did to Lance's post.

:D

ALL THESE PONDS ARE YOURS TO USE, EXCEPT FIRESTONE 2. ATTEMPT NO SEINING THERE.
(Repeated 179 times)

Ok Brettski it's time to bring out the ultimate weapon....guilt.

Here goes:

Donna-ski, it is imperative that you allocate to me the required amount of resources to complete my pond projects. Without adequate funding the ecological balance of our pristine nature preserve could be irreparably damaged. Innocent flora and fauna would suffer needlessly. Fish would become disease ridden and yes even die. Dying fish give off green house gases. Green house gases cause global warming. So I ask you Donna-ski, do YOU really want to be the cause of global warming????

In my next life, after I ace the SAT, graduate magna cum laude from a good liberal arts college with dual majors in English and Physical Chemistry, and get a Phd in philosophy, my real ambition will be to make it past one reply to one of Theo's postings on the forum without being left berefit of an appropriate response.

B'ski, I think JHP may have the right idea, but if you lay it on too thick you might risk a backlash-my wife would say "..then drain the dammed pond and plant a high carbon sink like sorghum!"

I call it "inner tube logic". Here is how it works.

Honey, I've been thinking about getting an inner tube to float around in.

Oh, that sounds nice.

Honey, you know as long as I am getting an inner tube, I should get a small rubber raft so we can both have a nice float.

Oh, that sounds nice.

Honey, you know as long as WE are getting a rubber raft, we should get a small aluminum fishing boat so we can do a little crabbing in the Summer.

Oh...umm..that sounds nice.

Honey, you know as long as we are getting a small aluminum fishing boat, we should get a little runabout for skiing and romantic evening cruises.

Oh...well...umm...that sounds nice.

Honey, you know as long as we are getting a small runabout, we should get something with a top and small cuddy cabin because we do live in the PNW and does rain.

Oh...well...umm...aaah...okay that sounds nice.

Hey Joe, that's called the "stone soup" approach.

Another approach that may work:

Positive approach: "Well dear, we spent all those thousands to attain our goal, and we're almost finished. Another thousand or 2, and we're there!"

Negative approach: "Well dear, we're almost finished. Only 1 or 2 little minor things left to buy! It would be a shame to waste all those thousands by capping our spending now."

This is all good fun, but everyone knows that Donna-Ski would see these amateur ploys coming a mile away. I think Brettski would only get "the look" for his scheming.

How about this method ?

Donna-ski, dear, you knew when you saw that cold frozen dove that the right thing to do was bring it home and nurse it back to health and feed it until it could live on its own.

You know you were right and I felt the same way and supported you 100%.

You know the pond is the same way. It is cold unfulfilled and needs fish to bring it back to life and complete its purpose. I know the right thing to do is put some fish in it so it can be complete and live on its own. I am sure glad you understand and are supporting me in this 100%.

You could do what my buddy did with some fishing gear. He wanted a new expensive fishing reel...so he bought two. Then he "let his wife find the evidence". In the spirit of compromise, he agreed to send one back. Genius. However, it may be harder to get half fish out of the pond, so your results may differ.

Joe

How about this: See here, Donna, I've tried to be to be thoughtful in allowing you to express your opinion, but since your opinion conflicts with mine, you are no longer allowed an opinion. In the future I will make all the decisions in this family, and you will do as I say. Now get me a beer and put supper on the table as soon as you're finished with the laundry.

That ever work for you Dudley?

Hey Brettski, Thought you got good advice, good quality low quantity bait fish. Then your pond can save you money by growing it for you.