A Fish & Game Warden lives next door to a wildly successful fisherman. For years the F&GW has watched Bob next door never fail to bring home full creel limits of huge bass, bream crappie, and catfish. For years, he has pleaded and cajoled with Bob to reveal his secrets. Finally, Bob has agreed to take the F&GW along on a fishing excursion. "Just meet me in my driveway at 4:30 tomorrow morning," says Bob, "I'll take care of everything."

The F&GW shows up at 4:30 to find Bob has his truck and boat ready to roll. They drive for 3 hours over 2 lane blacktop roads, then 2 lane gravel roads , then 1 lane gravel roads, and then what appears to be a wide cowpath, arriving at a pristine, remote lake apparently untouched by man except for a small spot barely large enough to turn the rig around and launch the boat.

A half hour later, they are sitting in the boat in the middle of the lake. The F&GW notices that the boat contains no poles, bait, or lures, only a long handled net and a duffel bag. He questions this, and Bob tersely replies "I told you I'd take care of everything!"

Bob reaches in the duffel bag and pulls out 2 dozen sticks of dynamite. The F&GW stares with huge eyes, then proceeds to protests loud and long. "Dynamite? That's illegal as all get on! It's dangerous, too! You can't seriously be thinking of using dynamite, Bob."

Bob lights the first Dupont stick bait, hands it the the F&GW, and then calmly asks "Are you gonna talk, or are you gonna fish?"

"Live like you'll die tomorrow, but manage your grass like you'll live forever."
-S. M. Stirling
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