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I ended my marriage 23 years ago due to my wife's infidelity and our son was 4. She asked all our friends and family for forgiveness which was granted, as well as mine but we could not remain married. She then wanted full custody because she said she couldn't be without her son. I offered joint, shared physical and legal custody which she refused. I was ready to battle, yet still trying to reason with joint custody.

Prior to court, she called and said her counselor asked "have you thought that maybe Keith can't be without his son too?

She apologized for being selfish, we settled out of court with joint, shared physical and legal custody, alternating months, seeing our son every Wednesday and every other weekend on our off-months.

She and I still raised our son together (per se), went to conferences together as well as ballgames, scouts, etc. And most parents had no idea we were divorced.

23 years later, she and I are very close friends, I'm just as close to her family and friends as I was then, and her with mine.

And our son? To this day I know that he has never heard his dad say anything bad about his mom and has never heard his mom say anything bad about his dad.

Although there are seldom any winners in a divorce with children involved, our son was the true winner in this one. As he was growing up there was always a special glow in his eye when he was together with his mom and dad, and we tried to make that happen often.

John, our story seems to be a rare one but I share it to let couples know it's possible, to put all feelings aside and remember there is NO ONE more important than our kids!

Seek forgiveness, be humble, patient and understanding.