A friend of mine was recently arrested for killing a GBH. He was laid off back in 2009 and has had spotty employment since then (at best). He explained the situation to the judge, saying that his children were hungry and he couldn't bear to see them suffer. The judge was very understanding and dismissed the charge.
As my friend was turning to leave the courtroom, the judge asked "I'm curious, what does a great blue heron taste like?" My friend turned around and said, "well, kind of like a cross between a great horned owl and a bald eagle"
Sorry for the repeat if someone's told that one on here before...
