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I thought I would share the eulogy that I gave for my father. In order for this to make sense there are a few things that you should know. First and most important my father was a very, very funny man. He loved humor and always made my family laugh. That is the reason that this eulogy has an attempt at humor in it, it was in no way, shape or form being disrespectful, in was my way to honor him. Second I am his only son (in spite of the fact that the San Diego newspaper published my wife's name, Ricki, as a surviving son.)

JHAP's Eulogy:

Throughout our lives we encounter obstacles and difficult times. During times like these my dad had a unique way to change our perspective and attitude on the situation.

Dad taught us that you cannot always change events that happen in your life but you can always control how you react to them. So when faced with challenging times dad would simply say “just think of it as an adventure.”

We had many of these “adventures” in our lives. I would like to share one today.

Years ago mom & dad owned a boat that we used for water skiing. This was a beautiful wooden hulled Chris Craft Cavalier that was powered with a corvette motor.

We would ski behind this boat for hours on end.

One year during a camping trip to Lake Shasta we were spending a day of skiing and boating on the huge lake.

One unique feature of this boat was that it did not have a gas gauge. You had to determine the fuel level by stopping the boat and lowering a measuring stick into to the fuel tank to get a reading. So if the boat was moving your exact fuel level at any particular time was anyone’s guess.

Well on this particular day we had boated and ski’d our way far, far up one of the remote arms of the enormous lake. And then it happened. The engine sputtered to a halt when the last bit of gas was consumed.

So here we were very, very far away from any fuel dock or camp sites and out of gas.

There was one additional challenge that I probably should mention … we only had one paddle.

The thought of paddling this heavy wooden boat miles back to a fuel dock did not sit well a certain young and impatient son of Tom.

For the purposes of this story we will let his son’s name remain anonymous so as not to embarrass or otherwise incriminate me.

With one person using the only oar that we had and the rest of us using water skis as paddles we began to row.

We rowed this way for six days and five nights. We rationed the Dorritos and soda pop and supplemented that with birds and fish that we managed to catch for food. We drank the milk of the occasional coconut that floated by. We never questioned how a coconut got to Lake Shasta…..

Or at least that is the way it seemed to a certain nameless and impatient teenage son.

In truth we rowed for about an hour when another boat happened by and graciously towed us to a fuel dock.

During this process as I, I mean he, the nameless, faceless, anonymous, impatient son, became increasingly frustrated and angry.

This son started vocalizing his irritation toward the situation.

My dad told this son that a bad attitude would not help the situation. He said to me

“Just think of it as an adventure."

As an adult I have come to appreciate these so called adventures that our family has experienced over the years.

Dad was always able to change our perspective on the difficult times with just one simple phrase.

Just think of it as an adventure.

I cannot change the events that brought us here today. But hopefully i can give you just one of the many gifts that my father gave to me and that is this lesson:

All of you here will face challenges, adversities and difficult times in your lives.

You cannot always change the timing of an event or effect that an event may have on your life.

But you can always control how you react to these challenging times.

You get to choose how you treat others.

You get to chose whether you will display frustration or show understanding.

You get to choose whether or not you will react in anger, or in compassion.

So when faced with a challenging or difficult time i ask you to remember my dad’s words, the simple the phrase that he so often used to help my family face adversity…

Just think of it as an adventure.

My sister gave an excellent eulogy that was filled with humor. I had a great many people approach me afterward and comment that this was the first memorial service that they had ever been to that celebrated the fun life of a person. Many people laughted out loud during the eulogies. This really made me feel that we had honored Dad.

I can honestly tell you that the reality of my father being gone has not sunk in yet. I have not as yet faced the full meaning of his passing.

One ray of light in this process was my telephone conversation with Greg Grimes. Greg you are a class act. To extend a helping hand to me during a time of tragedy in your life illustrates what a giving person you are. I sincerely thank you. The photos of your father are fantastic. I'm sure your Dad and mine are fishing one of heavens ponds together.