Pond Boss Magazine
http://www.pondboss.com/images/userfiles/image/20130301193901_6_150by50orangewhyshouldsubscribejpeg.jpg
Advertisment
Newest Members
ty1174, Ervin, KiplingJ, tdirr, Schipprj
15744 Registered Users
Forum Stats
15744 Members
36 Forums
36221 Topics
493480 Posts

Max Online: 1210 @ 08/23/18 11:01 PM
Top Posters
esshup 24029
Cecil Baird1 20043
ewest 19662
Dave Davidson1 13661
Bill Cody 12638
Who's Online
15 registered (mattmonster1991, bassmaster61, PBS, Vortex 4, Pat Williamson, RStringer, roundy, hobbyman, rjackson, bigpullerman, wbuffetjr, CMM, DannyMac, ewest, FireIsHot), 185 Guests and 510 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Page 1 of 11 1 2 3 ... 10 11 >
Topic Options
#14880 - 05/20/06 01:12 PM Several unknown facts about redear sunfish
Bruce Condello Offline
Moderator
Ambassador
Field Correspondent

Lunker

Registered: 08/01/04
Posts: 8854
Loc: United States
1. Redear sunfish are always angry.
2. Redear sunfish don't sleep--they wait.
3. If you can see a redear sunfish, he can see you. If you can't see the redear sunfish, you may be only seconds away from death.
4. A redear sunfish refers to himself in the fourth person.
5. If a redear sunfish could push a button to eliminate every yellow perch on the planet, he would.
6. Similar to a Russian Nesting Doll, if you were to break open a redear sunfish you would find another redear sunfish, only smaller and angrier.
7. A redear sunfish's calender goes straight from March 30th to April 2nd--nobody fools a redear sunfish.
_________________________
Holding a redear sunfish is like running with scissors.

Top
#14881 - 05/20/06 01:23 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
PondsForFun Offline
Member

Registered: 12/24/05
Posts: 668
Loc: Central Texas
LOL! Bruce would you please explain 3, 4 and 6 to someone with no redear sunfish experience. :rolleyes: :p
_________________________
Please no more rain for a month! :|

Top
#14882 - 05/20/06 02:12 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
ewest Online   content
Moderator
Hall of Fame 2014

Lunker

Registered: 03/08/05
Posts: 19662
Loc: Miss.
Bruce what happened to cause such a post about RES? Did several or a trophy fin you and wee on you and get away? \:D ;\) :p
_________________________















Top
#14883 - 05/20/06 02:27 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
Bruce Condello Offline
Moderator
Ambassador
Field Correspondent

Lunker

Registered: 08/01/04
Posts: 8854
Loc: United States
8. When it comes time to pay taxes, a redear sunfish simply sends a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. A redear sunfish has not had to pay taxes--ever.
_________________________
Holding a redear sunfish is like running with scissors.

Top
#14884 - 05/20/06 03:43 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
burgermeister Offline
Lunker

Registered: 02/27/05
Posts: 4025
Loc: Houston, Tx.
 Quote:
Originally posted by PondsForFun:
LOL! Bruce would you please explain 3, 4 and 6 to someone with no redear sunfish experience. :rolleyes: :p
Bruce is off today. Need I say more? :p
_________________________

Top
#14885 - 05/20/06 04:57 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
Meadowlark Offline
Lunker

Registered: 03/09/04
Posts: 3075
Loc: East Texas
A RES has no reflection in the mirror.

Top
#14886 - 05/20/06 05:22 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
Brettski Offline
Ambassador
Field Correspondent
Lunker

Registered: 10/07/05
Posts: 6916
Loc: Illinois
Dear Dr Frankenbruce,
I am working on completion of a new pond and contemplating stocking it with only Redear Sunfish. I have read, tho, that they can be mean, agressive, and act with deadly force. I am a firm believer that negative attitude can be influenced to positive change, given the correct environment. For this reason, I have decided to make this same pond a waterpark with wave action and waterslides. This will generate fun and frolic for both the humans and the Redear Sunfish. I am certain this carnival atmosphere will surely draw out the playful side of RES, creating lasting postive memories.
Do you foresee any unanticipated problems with my plan?
Signed,
Fun loving fish guy
_________________________


Top
#14887 - 05/20/06 06:20 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
PondsForFun Offline
Member

Registered: 12/24/05
Posts: 668
Loc: Central Texas
I can just see the headlines:

New Waterpark Disaster!

3 Dead, 12 injured, 17 missing in the worst waterpark disaster in US history. One man was hauled away in chains after putting innocent people in the proximity of killer fish. He is said to be facing life plus 400 years. The legislature is considering the banishment of RES in all waters public and private. Bruce Condello, the breeder of the killer fish could not be contacted for comment. His lawyer said charges are pending.
_________________________
Please no more rain for a month! :|

Top
#14888 - 05/20/06 10:45 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
Theo Gallus Offline
Moderator
Lunker

Registered: 05/14/04
Posts: 12408
Loc: Central Ohio
 Quote:
Originally posted by Bruce Condello:
7. A redear sunfish's calender goes straight from March 30th to April 2nd--nobody fools a redear sunfish.
Apparently nobody can March 31st a Redear either. :rolleyes:

The Redears been ganging up on you lately, Bruce? They were biting pretty good here today.
_________________________
"Live like you'll die tomorrow, but manage your grass like you'll live forever."
-S. M. Stirling

Top
#14889 - 05/20/06 10:57 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
Bruce Condello Offline
Moderator
Ambassador
Field Correspondent

Lunker

Registered: 08/01/04
Posts: 8854
Loc: United States
9. The boogeyman can't sleep because he's afraid there's a redear sunfish in his closet.
_________________________
Holding a redear sunfish is like running with scissors.

Top
#14890 - 05/20/06 11:10 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
Theo Gallus Offline
Moderator
Lunker

Registered: 05/14/04
Posts: 12408
Loc: Central Ohio
10. How many Redears does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they make those wimpy Bluegill do it for them.
_________________________
"Live like you'll die tomorrow, but manage your grass like you'll live forever."
-S. M. Stirling

Top
#14891 - 05/20/06 11:13 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
Bruce Condello Offline
Moderator
Ambassador
Field Correspondent

Lunker

Registered: 08/01/04
Posts: 8854
Loc: United States
 Quote:
Originally posted by Brettski:

Do you foresee any unanticipated problems with my plan?
None whatsoever, unless you consider everyone dying a problem...
_________________________
Holding a redear sunfish is like running with scissors.

Top
#14892 - 05/21/06 12:07 AM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
Sunil Offline
Moderator
Ambassador
Field Correspondent
Hall of Fame 2014

Lunker

Registered: 09/03/03
Posts: 11574
Loc: Somerset, PA
Now I'm scared to go my pond.

Thanks.

Thanks a lot.
_________________________
Excerpt from Robert Crais' "The Monkey's Raincoat:"
"She took another microscopic bite of her sandwich, then pushed it away. Maybe she absorbed nutrients from her surroundings."


Top
#14893 - 05/21/06 08:09 AM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
ewest Online   content
Moderator
Hall of Fame 2014

Lunker

Registered: 03/08/05
Posts: 19662
Loc: Miss.
What happens when they send the national guard to the pond to take out the last RES ?

Just like in "Rambo" they need a lot more body bags.
_________________________















Top
#14894 - 05/21/06 09:42 AM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
Bruce Condello Offline
Moderator
Ambassador
Field Correspondent

Lunker

Registered: 08/01/04
Posts: 8854
Loc: United States
11. The redear sunfish crossed the road. Nobody ever dared question his motives.
_________________________
Holding a redear sunfish is like running with scissors.

Top
#14895 - 05/21/06 10:06 AM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
PondsForFun Offline
Member

Registered: 12/24/05
Posts: 668
Loc: Central Texas
You could write a booklet:

"Inside these pages is a list of all the creatures meaner than a redear sunfish".

Inside would be a dozen blank pages! :rolleyes:
_________________________
Please no more rain for a month! :|

Top
#14896 - 05/21/06 06:12 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
Bruce Condello Offline
Moderator
Ambassador
Field Correspondent

Lunker

Registered: 08/01/04
Posts: 8854
Loc: United States
Largemouth bass kill from instinct. Striped bass hybrids kill for sustenance.

Redear sunfish kill because they're bored of torturing.
_________________________
Holding a redear sunfish is like running with scissors.

Top
#14897 - 05/22/06 11:41 AM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
heybud Offline
Lunker

Registered: 03/14/06
Posts: 1319
Loc: Central Texas
If you want to keep your beer cold hold it next to a Redear Sunfish's heart.
_________________________
In Dog Beers, I've had one.

Top
#14898 - 05/22/06 11:51 AM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
Winston Offline
Member

Registered: 05/16/06
Posts: 76
Loc: Riverview, FL
Ok, I have to ask, I am not sure i have caught or seen a Redear Sunfish. What have you seen them do that makes them so mean?

Top
#14899 - 05/22/06 12:21 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
Alligator Offline
Lunker

Registered: 03/30/05
Posts: 821
Loc: East Texas
It is caused by a Napoleon complex.

Gator
_________________________
- Smoke 'em if you got 'em




Top
#14900 - 05/22/06 01:21 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
Bruce Condello Offline
Moderator
Ambassador
Field Correspondent

Lunker

Registered: 08/01/04
Posts: 8854
Loc: United States

_________________________
Holding a redear sunfish is like running with scissors.

Top
#14901 - 05/22/06 01:25 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
Sunil Offline
Moderator
Ambassador
Field Correspondent
Hall of Fame 2014

Lunker

Registered: 09/03/03
Posts: 11574
Loc: Somerset, PA
Bruce, I take it that this fish is verbally berating you, as well as defecating on you as you hold him?

Top
#14902 - 05/22/06 01:31 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
Alligator Offline
Lunker

Registered: 03/30/05
Posts: 821
Loc: East Texas
Geeze Bruce - that thing is a freakin monster...very impressive indeed!

Gator
_________________________
- Smoke 'em if you got 'em




Top
#14903 - 05/22/06 01:48 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
Brettski Offline
Ambassador
Field Correspondent
Lunker

Registered: 10/07/05
Posts: 6916
Loc: Illinois
 Quote:
Geeze Bruce - that thing is a freakin monster...very impressive indeed!
...illusion. Bruce has very tiny hands (occupation advantage)
It should be noted, tho, that the "come hither" stare is bone chilling
 Quote:
Bruce, I take it that this fish if verbally berating you
...either that, or a rendition of "Take me to the river".
-
(beauty!)
_________________________


Top
#14904 - 05/22/06 02:49 PM Re: Several unknown fact about redear sunfish
Alligator Offline
Lunker

Registered: 03/30/05
Posts: 821
Loc: East Texas
That "THANG", whatever it is, would scare off most of my LMB!



It gives me the heebie jeebies just staring into it's eyes.

Gator

(all kidding aside - that is one heck of a nice fish Bruce)
_________________________
- Smoke 'em if you got 'em




Top
Page 1 of 11 1 2 3 ... 10 11 >

Today's Birthdays
clearwell, Duszy
Recent Posts
flathead catfish
by mattmonster1991
0 seconds ago
DUI - Texas style
by RStringer
26 minutes 28 seconds ago
Bass on lure
by DannyMac
Today at 12:16 PM
Flames' big bass Jan 2019
by ewest
Today at 12:07 PM
Hall of Fame 2019
by Pond Boss
Today at 11:42 AM
Phoslock
by Theo Gallus
Today at 11:07 AM
What did you do at your pond today?
by Pat Williamson
Today at 11:03 AM
Optimal Bluegill fish food
by DannyMac
Today at 09:40 AM
Football
by Pat Williamson
Today at 12:29 AM
Chip off the old cinderblock....
by Pat Williamson
Today at 12:21 AM
Newly Uploaded Images
Pond site
Pond dig
My recent haul
Hello From Lufkin Texas!
Cant seem to Identify what this is.  Any thoughts?
Evaluating and adjusting Fish populations and ID

2014 POND BOSS INC. all rights reserved USA and Worldwide