Pond Boss Forums GENERAL QUESTIONS Pond Boss For the ladies of PB

Three fishermen were fishing when they came upon a mermaid, the mermaid offered them one wish each so the first fisherman said: "double my I.Q" so the mermaid did it and to his surprise he started reciting shakespeare. Then the second fisherman said: "triple my I.Q." and sure enough the mermaid did it and amazingly he started doing math problems he didn't know existed. The third fisherman was so impressed he asked the mermaid to quadruple his I.Q and the mermaid said "Are you sure about this? It will change your whole life!" the fisherman said "yes" so the mermaid turned him into a woman.

oy....

i liked the fishing reward a WHOLE lot better....

Quick, we need an antidote!

Men strike back!

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How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.

Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.

Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.

How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."

How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.

Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.

If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.

I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.

Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%. It's called a Wedding Cake.

Why do men die before their wives? They want to.

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created Man and rested. Then God created Woman. Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.

Gdub, I think everybody is either dumbfounded or afraid to answer; maybe the 'better half' is standing behind with the infamous seasoned skillet. nyuk! nyuk!

I'm probably in trouble.

GW...cute. And you wonder why the term "doghouse" is around. You probably are or are going to be in the doghouse (he!he!). I'll share these with my hubby (he'll get a good laugh). I'm going to let you slide on this one as it's too early to think and I haven't had my coffee........

edit

GW,I posted that to get out of the doghouse,not get you into it.And yes,when your girlfriend sees that,youve had it

I'd have to agree GW.

If you would have posted one retort or possibly two, no problem. But a 12:1 slam ratio??? Dude your beyond redemption, completely and thoroughly beyond redemption.

You might want to consider having someone taste your food first for the next few weeks.

I do the cooking. The best cooks are always men.

Bam!

Dang Sunil, what do you have against puppies?

Wow GW, moderated by Sunil. That is legendary my friend, absolutely legendary. I can only hope that one day I'll post something questionable enough to be moderated by Sunil.

Everything you post is questionable.

True that. Sunil is like a folk hero. He is able to both "Work for the Man" and "Stick it to the Man" at the same time.

It's a delicate balance.

Hmm. Considering my recent moderationfication I will resist the urge to twist JHAP's post into something unseemly.

See, I can learn.

And in another sense, he IS the Man.

Sunil is sticking it to himself!

You couldn't resist.

Oh, GW, just when we thought that you had reformed.

I call shenanigans on myself.

a small glimmer of light appears on the horizon.