TOP TEN REASONS WHY ALL YOUR STUFF WILL BE IN THE YARD WHEN YOU GET HOME FROM THE POND BOSS CONVENTION


10. You don't understand how I can tell when you used the electric fish scaler in the house.

9. You documented every time your fish spawned in the last 6 years, but you never make a nest for me.

8. You can give the species and genotype of every fish and plant in the pond, but are unsure of your children's names.

7. When asked how old the children are, you replied "Don't know; let's crack their otoliths and find out."

6. Arriving home from work, you walked past a happy-to-see-you me to rush to the basement and see how the fish in the PBR survived the day without you. See number 9.

5. The next day, you walked past me in the kitchen (pausing to steal my Diet Mountain Dew) and rushed to computer room to see what you missed on the Pond Boss Forum while driving home from work. See numbers 6 and 9.

4. You have digital photographs of every fish you've ever caught. You deleted the family photos off the computer so it would have enough disk space to hold them.

3. We still haven't gotten a deck on the back of the house after 17 years, but you're making plans with the excavator to build a second pond.

2. You thought renewing the subscription to Pond Boss in my name was a great birthday present for me.

1. You couldn't make our anniversary party because the new issue of Pond Boss arrived that day.

Theo,

Looks like she's a perfect candidate for that truck ride to Texas with you next month. Offer a cab seat instead of the bed seat and you might win some points.

Dont ask her to split the cost for gas. More points.

Theo too funny but I know first hand she had a part in your love of ponds. She was excited when ordering the fish tag gun or was it a feeder? Anyway sounds like you might want to stop by the flower shop on the ride back. Cactus flower might be a good choice to show you thought of her while in TX.

This letter is merely a set up for a second letter that is going to ask (or command) Theo to sell his '70s vintage Camero to fund a trip for Mrs. Gallus to attend a fine Arizona Spa for (10) days.

It is a fine utilization of the "give 'em enough rope to hang themselves" mantra. She has let you go so far (albeit maybe too far) into the realm of Pondidy, that you are now overcommitted and have zero negotiating power.

This is another way of saying that you've run out of leverage.

I used mine up about five years ago.

Bruce, that would seem to indicate that you "had" leverage for at least say 10 years before you lost it?

That can't be right.

I thought #10, 4, and 2 hit home pretty close for me. Brook is already tired of hearing about the conference. Apparently i think too much about fish, structure, and food plots.

been married 4 years, all leverage is almost lost.

very funny list

It looks like you have used up all the points we got by helping her with your tag-gun and clippers gift as well as any you had. A shopping trip to Dallas to join some of the other wives to share stories might just bail you out !!

ewest, while I'm always for people getting together, it could be a dangerous thing to get all the significant others to know each other.

Imagine the leverage then. They'd be able to collective bargain against us, them unified in cause, and us singly left on our respective home fronts to battle against a pre-informed opponent.

I'll be solo (as of right now anyway).

Everything is under control. We're working on a convention deal for significant others.

I'm negotiating limo rental for trips to the fishing area of Bass Pro Shops on Friday. Next day is Cabelas to tour the same department. The tour guide will be instructed to carefully avoid the clothing areas so there will be minimal distractions. It has been suggested that the first stop should be to the aquarium(s) so they will have a better idea of what they will be trying to accomplish. To assure fairness, there will be a Q & A session prior to the written test. Depending on what is "bagged" during the tours, the test may not be mandatory. My buddy and seemingly constant companion, Mr. R. Crabtree, is the front runner for the guide position.

Dave, perhaps a nice locked-door limo tour of some of the nice retention ponds in the DFW Metroplex is in order.

Augment that with the in-limo AV system to air Bill Dance and In Fisherman episodes, set to repeat or continuously loop.

Catfish for lunch too; maybe Tilapia for dinner.

Say pick up the ladies at 7AM and have them back to the hotel around midnight??

Dang, DD, those Bass Pro/Cabela's shopping trips are a mighty thoughtful idea.

Everyone bringing a spouse along needs to prepare a list of important fishing stuff they need purchased for them.

I can see it now circle hooks for Xmas. :p

"I can see it now circle hooks for Xmas."

Come on ewest!!! That's a given.

Who would have ever thought that a nice package of circle hooks could replace diamonds as a gift?

I can't take credit though. It was someone else from the forum who suggested circle hooks as the gift that keeps on giving.

Moi?

I think it was Bruce or maybe Theo. :p

I think it was Brucille.

I got circle hooks for Xmas last year. As a double surprise, they were hidden inside new underwear.

Norm Kopecky's right - you don't have to set circle hooks, they set themselves.

I was talking to one of my coworkers as I was reading Theo's post, and I started laughing out loud; then I had to explain myself.

Theo Gallus -

Tell me about that Camaro, I have room for at least one more long term project!

'79 Rally Sport, currently between 20k & 21k miles.

I could store that for you. Very nice

Dang!! That's nice.

Theo,
I think letting my wife read your post might not have been a good idea as I found this note when I came home yesterday.
The trash bags didnt disappear,I used them to put your stuff in.
The cement blocks didnt disappear,I used them to wieght your stuff down.
Your powertools and wrenches didnt disappear,you
didnt have enough blocks.
You said you needed vertical structure in the pond so I thought it was time I helped you.The bags were triing to float so I wieghted them down.Hope you enjoy the new structure in the pond.I had lots of fun putting it in.Im sure I will enjoy the pond much more now that Ive actually helped with one of its projects.
Love...S

P.S. If thats not enough strcture leave your truck home tommorrow.

There sure are a lot of cynical wives out there.

BTW, where is everyone???

I know I couldn't get on the forum earlier today, but it seems to be dead this afternoon.

here i was, a day in the office, ready for a few good arguments on PB here and there and it was really dead today.....as i am off for field work the rest of the week, i'm sure it will livin' up.

Ah-hah! Just when I thought the slow day was due to everyone being off work because of the weather, this possible explanation pops up. Internet Pirates!

Jeffhasapond is stuck in tax season hell. Can I say hell on here. Oops I did it again!

yeehah, my drilling job is cancelled til tomorrow.

a special side note for the IRS this year.....i am claiming my 29 lunker GSF as dependants in 2006