Pond Boss Forums POND CONSTRUCTION Building a dam This dam

Had a good chuckle over this one. It kind of reminded me about the story regarding
a Dept. of Interior representative telling the Wyoming sheep ranchers how to manage
their coyote problem throughout the state by catching and castrating the male coyotes.

The Dam



This is an actual letter sent to a man named Ryan DeVries regarding a pond on his property.
It was sent by the Pennsylvania Department of Environmental Quality, State of Pennsylvania . This
guy's response is hilarious, but read The State's letter before you get to the response letter.



State of Pennsylvania 's letter to Mr. DeVries:



SUBJECT: DEQ
File No.97-59-0023; T11N; R10W, Sec 20; Lycoming County

Dear Mr. DeVries :

It has come to the attention of the Department of Environmental Quality that there
has been recent unauthorized activity on the above referenced parcel of property.
You have been certified as the legal landowner and/or contractor who did the
following unauthorized activity:

Construction and maintenance of two wood debris dams across the outlet stream
of Spring Pond.

A permit must be issued prior to the start of this type of activity.. A review of the
Department's files shows that no permits have been issued Therefore, the
Department has determined that this activity is in violation of Part 301, Inland
Lakes and Streams, of the Natural Resource and Environmental Protection Act,
Act 451 of the Public Acts of 1994, being sections 324.30101 to 324.30113 of
the Pennsylvania Compiled Laws, annotated.

The Department has been informed that one or both of the dams partially failed
during a recent rain event, causing debris and flooding at downstream locations..
We find that dams of this nature are inherently hazardous and cannot be permitted.
The Department therefore orders you to cease and desist all activities at this
location, and to restore the stream to a free-flow condition by removing all wood
and brush forming the dams from the stream channel. All restoration work shall
be completed no later than January 31, 2010.

Please notify this office when the restoration has been completed so that a
follow-up site inspection may be scheduled by our staff. Failure to comply with
this request or any further unauthorized activity on the site may result in this case
being referred for elevated enforcement action..

We anticipate and would appreciate your full cooperation in this matter. Please
feel free to contact me at this office if you have any questions.

Sincerely,
David L. Price
District Representative and Water Management Division.


Here is the actual response sent back by Mr. DeVries:


Re: DEQ File
No.. 97-59-0023; T11N; R10W, Sec. 20; Lycoming County

Dear Mr..Price,

Your certified letter dated 1 1/17/09 has been handed to me. I am the legal
landowner but not the Contractor at 2088 Dagget Lane , Trout Run, Pennsylvania .

A couple of beavers are in the (State unauthorized) process of constructing and
maintaining two wood 'debris' dams across the outlet stream of my Spring Pond.
While I did not pay for, authorize, nor supervise their dam project, I think they
would be highly offended that you call their skillful use of natures building materials
'debris.'

I would like to challenge your department to attempt to emulate their dam project
any time and/or any place you choose. I believe I can safely state there is no way
you could ever match their dam skills, their dam resourcefulness, their dam ingenuity,
their dam persistence, their dam determination and/or their dam work ethic.




These are the beavers/contractors you are seeking. As to your request, I do not
think the beavers are aware that they must first fill out a dam permit prior to the
start of this type of dam activity.

My first dam question to you is:
(1) Are you trying to discriminate against my Spring Pond Beavers, or
(2) do you require all beavers throughout this State to conform to said dam request?

If you are not discriminating against these particular beavers, through the Freedom
of Information Act, I request completed copies of all those other applicable beaver
dam permits that have been issued. (Perhaps we will see if there really is a dam
violation of Part 301, Inland Lakes and Streams, of the Natural Resource and
Environmental Protection Act, Act 451 of the Public Acts of 1994, being sections
324.30101 to 324.30113 of the Pennsylvania Compiled Laws, annotated.)

I have several dam concerns. My first dam concern is, aren't the beavers entitled
to legal representation? The Spring Pond Beavers are financially destitute and
are unable to pay for said representation -- so the State will have to provide them
with a dam lawyer.

The Department's dam concern that either one or both of the dams failed during
a recent rain event, causing flooding, is proof that this is a natural occurrence,
which the Department is required to protect. In other words, we should leave the
Spring Pond Beavers alone rather than harassing them and calling them dam names.

If you want the damed stream 'restored' to a dam free-flow condition please contact
the beavers -- but if you are going to arrest them, they obviously did not pay any
attention to your dam letter, they being unable to read English.

In my humble opinion, the Spring Pond Beavers have a right to build their unauthorized
dams as long as the sky is blue, the grass is green and water flows downstream. They
have more dam rights than I do to live and enjoy Spring Pond. If the Department of
Natural Resources and Environmental Protection lives up to its name, it should protect
the natural resources (Beavers) and the environment (Beavers' Dams).

So, as far as the beavers and I are concerned, this dam case can be referred for more
elevated enforcement action right now. Why wait until 1/31/2010? The Spring Pond
Beavers may be under the dam ice by then and there will be no way for you or your dam
staff to contact/harass them.

In conclusion, I would like to bring to your attention to a real environmental quality, health,
problem in the area It is the bears! Bears are actually defecating in our woods. I
definitely believe you should be persecuting the defecating bears and leave the beavers
alone. If you are going to investigate the beaver dam, watch your dam step! The bears
are not careful where they dump!

Being unable to comply with your dam request, and being unable to contact you on your
dam answering machine, I am sending this response to your dam office.

THANK YOU,


RYAN DEVRIES & THE DAM BEAVERS

That's a Dam funny letter.